This is my computer. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

My computer is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.

My computer, without me, is useless. Without my computer, I am useless. I must configure my computer true. I must secure it straighter than my enemy who is trying to exploit me. I must crash him before he crashes me. I will!

My computer and I know that what counts in the net is not the packets we fire, the size of our payload, nor the spoofing we use. We know that it is the pwns that count. We will pwn!

My computer is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its parts, its accessories, its keyboard and its network connection. I will keep my computer clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will sync.

Before Boole, I swear this creed. My computer and I are the defenders of freedom. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviors of my life.

So be it, until victory is GNUs and there is no closed-source software, but peace!